My bread maker seems to be working well, I haven't tasted the product yet, but it did mix, kneed, rise and bake the ingredients. It is a Sanyo model, so I was looking at the Sanyo website to see if I could find a link to the breadmaker. I didn't find the bread maker, but I did find a Hello Kitty toaster!

SK-KT21P
Toasts "Hello Kitty" Face on Each Slice
Contemporary Two-Slice Toaster
Decorative Cool-Touch Exterior
Six Shade Settings
Self-Adjusting Bread Guides
LED Power Indicator
Separate Removable Crumb Tray
Cord Storge on Bottom

I bought a bread making machine at Thrift Town for $9.99. If it actually works, it's going to be awesome. I'm going to go attempt bread right now!

http://www.20q.net/

You've got to try this, it totally guessed "horseradish" with 19 questions.
I'm amazed. (then again, sometimes it doesn't take much)

I took my little dog for a walk and this drunk Mexican guy on the other side of the street yelled across to me, "Hey! That is a funny looking chihauhau!"

I thought to myself, "Self, this is true, my dachshund is a funny looking chihauhau."

A kid and his mom were walking on the sidewalk in Dallas. The kid, being 100% Texan, upon seeing some cowboys, said,
"Hey Maw, look at them thar men with them thar bowed laigs."
She said that if he didn't start speaking correct English,she was going to send him to a Shakespearean English school. A little furtyher along, they saw some more cowboys.
"Hey maw! Look at them thar men with them thar bowed legs!" hesaid.
So, true to her word, she sent him off to a ShakespeareanEnglish school to learn correct English. He came home several months later on vacation. As they walked together down the sidewalk, they saw some cowboys.
"Hark!" he said, "What manner of men are these who weartheir legs in parentheses?"

Received from Robert E. Hays (and Misty Mae)

From time to time, walking catfish may be seen migrating en masse from water body to water body, often traversing busy South Florida roads in the process. Such migrations take place most often on rainy nights, as the cool moist conditions reduce the risk of desiccation and abrasion. Nonetheless, scores of individual walking catfish are often killed during these movements by automobile traffic. Sections of roads such as U.S. 41 (Tamiami Trail) can actually become hazardously slick with the crushed bodies of walking catfish.

I saw a walking catfish once. It was swimming. I said, "How did that fish get in that ditch." Some guy said, "It walked." I said, "No, seriously, how did it get in there?" He said, "Seriously, it walked." 10 years later I see that he was telling the truth. God Bless the Internet.

Did I mention I got "A" s in both my classes?
I did
I am so much smarter this semester than I was last semester!

Baby Got BookCopyright 2004, Dan Smith

Intro
Oh my goodness, Becky, look at her BibleIt is so bigShe looks like one of those preacher guys girlfriendsBut... you know... Who understands those preacher boysThey only talk to her because she looks like Mother Teresa, ok?I mean her Bible... it's just so bigI can't believe it's so hugeUgh! It gross!Look, she's just so... righteous

Verse 1
I like big Bibles and I can not lie
You Christian brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with a KJV
And a book mark in Proverbs
You get stokedGot her name engraved
So you know that girl is saved
It looks like one of those large ones
With plenty o' space in the margins
Oh baby, I wanna read witcha
Cause your Bible's got pictures
My minister tried to console me
But that Book you got makes
("M-m-me so holy")
Ooh, momma-mia
You say you want koinonia
Well, bless me, bless me
And teach me about John Wesley
I saw her prayingWhile
I was DJingShe got grace...pretty face
She ain't goin' down to the bad place
I'm tired of heathen guys
Sayin' they like pocket-size
Ask the average Christian to take a look
She's gotta pack much Book
So...Fellas (Yeah), fellas (Yeah)
Has your girlfriend got the Book (Oh yeah!)
Well, read it (Read it!), read it (Read it!), read that Holy BookBaby got Book

Chorus
(NIV with a ribbon bookmark)
Baby got Book(NIV with a ribbon bookmark)

go to http://www.whiteboydj.com/babygotbook/lyrics.html to see the video, hear the song, and see the rest of the lyrics . . . there are alot!

Color Me Beautiful Carole Jackson, 1973
“Your bra can make or break the line of your outfit. Braless if fine for the woman with a youthful bust, but for the rest of us a bra is sexier and smoother. When you are wearing a bra, you nipple should be no more than three inches below your armpit (unless you are very full busted). Take a good look at yourself to be sure your bra is going its job. It may not be.”

Naturally the first thing I did after reading this was to pull out a ruler.
My bra is not doing its job. I thought it was just because I am old and chubby, but indeed it was good to find out that the lion’s bra was not doing its job either. Picture it, sitting in our shared cubical measuring the length between out arm pits and our nipples. Fortunately, most people ignore us completely.

I began to wonder, who was it that established this rule? Did somebody somewhere say, “Hey, when my nipple is three inches above my armpit, my breast really looks good.” And then, did she ask her friends? Did her friends all agree that 3 inches is in fact the just the right length for any woman . . . tall or short?

I shall never buy bean dip again!

I just mashed a can of black beans and added salsa and hot sauce and enjoyed the yummiest dip. Yes, just another sign for me that life is good when I don’t have to spend all day writing a paper.
I spent the day cutting out purse patterns. I shall spend tomorrow night sewing them together. It’s a beautiful life of leisure. I read part of a novel, I watched TV, I played free cell, I looked up Mule Facts on the net (they are sterile by the way) and I made bean dip.

Our neighbor has a puppy he’s giving away (FREE!). It’s a Dachshund, he's house broken, and he's great with kids. He’s giving it away because his wife says the dog ‘stares’ at her when she is undressing, and that gives her the ‘heebie-jeebies’. I think she is just weird!
If you’re interested, or know someone who is, let me know. Here’s a picture of the dog.

Thanks,

Finals . . .
Done and Done
Done well?
that's questionable
but certainly done.

I need to crawl in bed while I still have the energy.

So, I bought this "Swiss exercise ball." I have been skeptical, but I considered the matter further and decided that an exercise program which never actually requires you to stand up can't be all bad. Basically you roll around on the floor with an overgrown kick ball to "gain strength" and "acquire balance." Obviously I have not "acquired" my balance yet, as I kept falling off my ball. That dang little skinny blonde on the video makes it look so easy. "Just lay down on the ball, with your legs scissored out like this, and your arm behind your head and your head on the ball and the ball balanced on an elephant's trunk and the elephant balanced on a sea turtle drifting in the Indian Ocean. Look, it's easy."

I like to imagine that skinny blonde falling off her ball and the turtle nibbling on her ears and the elephant licking her toes, because there's a little wiener dog tormenting me in such a way. So I pause the skinny blonde, shut the dog in the bathroom, sit on the ball and "exhale with my belly button to my back," and restart the video.

(And fall off the ball again.)
But I know if she can do it, I can do it. I will never be a skinny blonde, but I can be an Amazon brunette with the ability to balance on a Swiss exercise ball.