I'm not a violent person, but there are times, like now, when I want to stab the boy who lives upstairs from me. Regardless of what time it says this blog was posted it is now 11:46pm and he just decided to turn his music WAY UP. Every freaking night. I've complained, my room mates have complained-- I don't even know what this boy looks like, but I do want to stab him.

SHE says:
sometimes I think my whole life is an ongoing bob dylan stream of consciousness song
theyblinked says:
that is an exciting way to think about it.

Summer does NOT endorse multi-colored Sweedish Fish--- only red ones.

A letter to Who ever is in charge of the Texas State Fair--

To Whom it May Concern:
I am writing concerning my recent visit to the Texas State Fair. As I was a first time visitor, I was very impressed with the wide variety of shows, events, displays, rides and games. Admittedly, I was somewhat skeptical of the $11.00 price tag for the entrance price, but I
feel after walking around for 7 and a half hours, I got my money’s worth (although I can’t say the same for the $7.00 parking, that was just a racket.)

As I said, I enjoyed the fair, however, I do have a few suggestions to make the event even more enjoyable for next year. First of all, it is generally believed that ‘Big Tex’ is of the homosexual persuasion. I can neither confirm nor deny this belief, being as Tex and I conversed only briefly. (I have my suspicions-- ‘straight’ cowboys don’t really tuck their jeans into their boots-- you know what I’m saying?) However, I believe a statement should be made concerning his orientation. If he is in fact gay, I am sure it would encourage the homosexual constituency of Dallas to rally around Big Tex and support his decision by sponsoring colorful and entertaining ‘alternative’ events within all the fair categories. For example, my friend has an idea for a new ride called ‘AssseX.’ I’m sure it would be a big thrill for everyone! If he’s not gay-- I know the Southern Baptist Convention will continue to stand by Big Tex.

The second suggestion I’d like to make if for more Nigerian Pygmy goat shows--honestly those pygmy goats were simply fascinating. Thirdly, (also concerning goats in a manner of thinking) I believe you could engage more of our Muslim brothers and sisters in the livestock competitions and shows if you changed the name of the “Swine Barn” to “The Goats of the West House.” I find it an all together more apealing name for easterners and westerners alike.

My fourth suggestions concerns the “Spirit of the Dance” show. My friend and I recommend more Cowboys, more Patty-Cake and more black lights. Maybe Cowboys Patty-Caking in black light? It’s just a thought. Maybe a dancing fetus and a giant uterus would add a little pizzazz to the show as well. Stop the singing-stop the madness!

Finally I’d like to address the issue of the scantily clad puppets I saw at the “World on a String” show. Assuredly I did NOT expect to be confronted by mostly naked puppets at the onset of the production. Let me assure you I was both shocked and appalled by the display. I’m sure it should have had a PG. rating on the front curtain.

Thank you so much for you time-- I know you will consider these suggestions for an even better Texas State Fair 2003.
Sincerely,
SD Peterson
PS-- What happened to the Cajun Sticks?

SWARMY- adj. revealing or marked by a smug, ingratiating, or false earnestness: unctuous "I like to go to free-lunch Fridays at the Tri-C to irritate the swarmy Christians who think they are better than the rest." (This is just an example sentance, I think the Christians I irritate on Fridays are earnest in their God-brown-nosing-activities.)

So, I've been duely warned to not have my actual adress on the web for the world to see. But wouldn't it be an adventure to meet the person who wadded through all the other crap not only on my little blog, but (any stranger who I didn't send the address to) the whole dang web to find MY address-- then be plucky enough to come stalk me? Maybe I'll take it off after all :0)

I apologize if you are offended by the following transcribed conversation. As a linguistics student I am dedicated to the study of natural conversation-- it's my job, don't you see, to record what is said and how it is said-- then think about it (and laugh about it) post it on the net for all to see --then write a paper about it. I hope you understand.

Summer: Because we were talking about David and Justin having ass sex a while ago. Did you get that?
Shannon: No, (turns on recorder) but I’ll turn it on now for any future references you’d like to make.
Sum: Any future refernces to what?
Shan: Ass sex.
Sum: (laughing)
Shan: Yeah
Sum: (laughing)
Justin: You’re all, heh-heh-heh ‘Shannon said ass sex’
Mirranda: Wow, I missed somethin’
Shan: Summer’s craking up
Flossie: Shannon said ‘ass sex’
Sum: (laughing)
Krista: An’ Summer’s just . . . dyin’
Mirranda: Wow . . .
Sum: (laughing)
Shannon: Anybody else wanna say it? Keep’er goin’
Mirranda: One time,
Krista: See, I don’t think it would phase her (Shannon interupting: 'Ass sex') if I said ‘ass sex’
Sum: It was funny that Shannon said ‘ass sex’
Mirranda: Oh, I know it was funny
Sum: Then you were like, ‘Shannon said ass sex’
Mirranda: One time I was teaching preschool one of my kids said somethin’ and he said “shiit” and I’d thought he’s said aybe “shoot” and I just didn’t understand’im and he kept sayin’ and and finally I was like, “Dylan, what are you sayin’? And the kid next to him turned to me and said, “he said shit.”
Sum: laughing
Melissa: Oh my God
David: Today, today one of my students was doing a play on the word sophmore and refered to the girls as ‘softwhores’
Shan: softwhores
David: Yeah, he got in trouble for that
Mel: Is that what happened during 8th period?
Dav: 7th period, that was what I was complaining about
Mel: What happened during 8th period?
Dav: It was really sweet
Mel: huh? You can’t tell everybody? (overlapping) Dav: I’m not going to tell it around them ‘cause then they’ll be all awwwwwh-eeahhh
Mel: Do it
Krista: Come on David share . . .
Mirranda: Yeah, you’re not sharing all your life with us, David
David: I don’t share all the meaningful stuff
Shan: Come on share
Krista: Just cough it up
David: All right, what it was, was, um, there’s a class across the hallway from me . .
Sum: Shannon said ‘ass sex’
(laughing)
Krista: So, anyway, David, what happened?
David: Class across the hall way, uh Miss Youngblood’s class- she teaches junior level, I
teach sophmores, an’ so it’s interesting, ‘cause I always like to keep up with my students to see, you know, that they’re keeping up with the other students
Sum: sure
David: Because if all my student’s are progressivly dumber than everyone elses-
Sum: it’s a problem
Dav: Then that means I- I messed up somewhere. This is like her favorite class, Miss Youngblood, her favorite class- an’ I peered in there and they’ve got like about 10 of my old students, like, it is literally like an all-star class of someof my favorite students
Sum: Cool
Dav: Like my-my most gifted, intelligent, creative. . . just kind students, they’re all wonderful . . .
Mel: alright . . .
Dav: Part of the story is telling the story the story (Mel: Oh . . . right . . .) there’s no punch line
Sum: There’s no punch line
Mirranda: Wai-Wai-Wait, Shannon knows one
Shannon: That’s how my stories are
Summer (laughing)
Shannon: Ass sex
David: Ass sex, at the very end, that’s the punch line
Sum: (laughing)
Mel: So, you came in, and they were all there. . .

It’s banned book week! (or month, I’m not sure how long we’re reading havoc causing titles.) I got a list of “The 100 Most fequently Challenged Books of 1990-2000.” Pretty exciting- I’ve been looking for a good reading list. Many of these books are children’s books, and Newberry award winners. Others are required reading for (I thought most) high school students. Still others, I’ve never heard of, but I’ve looked up and they really do sound a little risqué, but so what?
Here’s the site, check out the list for yourself. http://www.ala.org/bbooks/top100bannedbooks.html.
I’ve read 20% of these books (I better get cracking on the rest of these titles!) and will recommend several titles as really enjoyable reading.

I suggest the following “challenged” books:
#22 A WRINKLE IN TIME, Madaline L'Engle (for 10-14 year old readers)
# 37 THE HANDMAIDEN’S TALE, Margaret Atwood (adult-negative utopia)
# 41 TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD, Harper Lee (highschool-adult)
#52 BRAVE NEW W0RLD, Aldous Huxley (highschool-adult -negative utopia)
#56 JAMES AND THE GIANT PEACH, Ronald Dahl. (8-12)

another site is http://www.ala.org/pio/presskits/bbwkit/classics.html

I got a call from a long lost penpal last night. He's been my "penpal" for a long, long time--we started writing in 1991 when he was serving in Saudi during the Gulf War. After a few years we dwindled down to just Christmas cards and an occational post card-- (how we kept up with each other between all our moves is mindboggling) then came along email and messenger services--- and the fact that he's now stationed in the states so he can call. I'm still dirt poor (dispite financial aid) so I leave the calling up to him, but I think its so cool to have a friend I've never met out there.

Okay, I promise I'll get off the mail topic soon, but not before I say I got an invitation to my 10 year highschool reunion. *gasp* I'm officially old. And what I need to know is HOW DID THEY FIND ME? Seriously-- I haven't kept in touch with any highschool people. I knew it would be coming up, but I was confident that they wouldn't find me! *sigh* I'm not going-- as far as I'm concerned they already know too much!

"I am a SWF, I have eyes and hair. I like traffic lights and long walks on paved and non-paved areas. I love the taste of water. I'm looking for someone with similar disinterests. I will not accept correspondence from Ghana."
Shannon Peterson
no address here - you should have gotten it when you had the chance
Arlington, TX 76013

I was looking a a penpal site this morning-- amusing myself by reading the profiles-- (this penpal thing goes back to the mail obsession) looking for someone who could at least make themselves sound semi-interesting. (not happening) I kept noticing people saying they wouldn't accept correspondance from inmates, perverts or Ghana. What's wrong with Ghana?

Defining day in Shannonland--I got the key. You want to hear room mate stories? I got ‘em. These stories will never live up to “The Betty Saga,” but I work with what I have. Perhaps I should publish previous aspects of my life. I’m thinking an autobiography--- “the extraordinary life of miss peterson: adventures in Shannonland.” Anyway, back to the precursor to the point-- I am (and some people don’t believe it, but I swear it’s true) an eternal optimist. Sure, a sarcastic, critical optimist, but optimistic none-the-less. I’m always expecting something good to happen. I don’t know where it might be coming from, so I have to check all the avenues. Mailbox, (there might be a letter from a long lost friend, or even a check from, well who cares if it is made out to me?) email, (perhaps someone has been thinking about me-- sent me a thoughtful and encouraging message, a funny joke or a great story) answering machine- maybe a call from a friend who wants to take me to lunch (take me anywhere, I don’t have a car, I need to get out more.) I walk through my life expecting good things, looking for them. My theory/motto is “it can’t always suck like this.” Sure, I’m
often disappointed, and sometimes surprised. Things happen, they aren’t always good--they are most often just plain weird, but that’s another topic.

All this background information to say (here’s the point.) I like to check the mail. I really like it. It’s not as bad as my lip gloss addiction, but it is way up on my list “Important things in Shannonland.” So, last night I walk in and ask if anyone has checked the mail that day. My roommate, Kelly, says “Are you expecting something?” Am I expecting something? Of course I’m expecting something! I’m always expecting something! Anything!
I say, “Yes.” (Although I can’t really name anything specific I’m expecting.)
She says, “Okay, I guess I’ll go look.”
I say, “I’ll go if you give me the key.”
She says, “no, (sigh) I’ll go.” (The burden of it all.) She doesn’t get mail here, she gets her mail at her mom’s house, she has no stock in this checking of the mailbox ritual.
I say, “Why don’t you just leave the key in the kitchen so we can all use it when we want to?” (She’s kind of a control freak, this one.)
She says, “Because the key is in my name, and if any one of you loses it, I have to pay $30.00 to have it replaced.”
First of all $30 for a stupid little key? That’s insane! Second, like we aren’t going to pay her if we lose it. Duh--
So I just said, “Okay, fine.”

A few minutes later, she comes back saying the key doesn’t work, and there’s a new lock on the mailbox. So, today I went to the office and asked about it, and I got the new key. In MY name. It’s a little gold key that feeds my addiction. NOW I HAVE THE POWER! HA-HAAA!

Anyway, I got some good news and some bad news in my mail box today. First the bad news. Centennial Courts regretted to inform me that I was not selected for the community assistants position. Punks, I was “amazing” in my Miss America interview! I must have been too good to be true, their loss. The good news was I got my free poster from the University of California Davis,
School of Veterinary Medicine. It’s a picture of a cow’s head (practically life size) and it says, “Udderly the best! UCDavis” I figure I’ll cover up the UCDavis part and have a fully functional advertisement free poster. The other good news was that I (FINALLY) got my financial aid check. Yeah! Now I can pay rent, buy books, food and toilet paper (Thanks to Blondi for the thoughtful birthday gift, of course it was fabulous to receive in such a timely manner.)

My day was full of other good things too. For example, I got my computer to work, I got my TV cable to work, and I got free lunch with the Christians. At lunch I argued with some missionary lady about Harry Potter. Neither one of us had even read it, but it was fun to get her going. To celebrate my financial aid check I went to the store, bought some ice cream and a vanilla coke and had a private party. Wow-- lunch and a semi-diner in the same day. I am living it up!

This is suddenly alot of pressure to perform