the last time ...

 Parents record babies' firsts.  The first time they roll over, sleep through the night, eat solid food, sit up, take a step, etc.  It is very exciting for parents to see their kids hit these milestones.  It lets us know everything is okay- our baby is on track- she is normal- or even more exciting- she is ahead of the curve. 

While I was thinking about this I realized I have videos of my older kids' first steps, but nothing for the youngest. Pooh.

For my youngest, I want to remember the lasts.  Not her lasts- mine.  The last time I gave her a bottle, the last time I changed a diaper, the last time I gave her a pacifier.  Those have all happened.  There are other lasts with her and with my other girls.  

When will be the last time she raises her arms and says "Up, Mama!"  Sometimes I say, "No, you can walk."  Or "No, you are big now, I can't up you."  But the next time I think- 'Today is not that last time- not today!' and I pick her up and cuddle her because she's my last baby.

The other girls still want to hold my hand, and want me to help them wash their hair.  They want me to brush their hair and read with them and draw with them.  But they also do a lot of things on their own.  Little by little our lasts come with our children.  

I'm watching out for mine.  I don't want to look back and say- "I don't remember the last time I ..."