The corner by the door

Grey carpet in our apartment, covered near the door by a tribal looking carpet. It’s blue, black and off white, with geometric shapes and bits of orange, red, green and blue dispersed throughout. Carpets always sound worse when you describe them then they do when you see them. My room mate has left four pairs of shoes by the door, work shoes, tennis shoes, dress shoes and flip-flops.

Usually by the time the collection has grown to that size, I’m tired of looking at them and I gather them up and throw to the middle of the floor in the bedroom. I then announce that we need to clean the bedroom because it’s making me claustrophobic. It’s never just the shoes. It’s all our stuff that oozes out of our closet, dresser drawers and laundry baskets. It’s things that have places, under the bed, in the corner, tucked under a table that creep out to the middle of the floor until there is not carpet to be seen, no flat surfaces apparent. . .

I digress.

Above the carpet, above the shoes, there is a night light. It is The Virgin Mary holding her sacred heart. Mary is always turned on, so to speak.

Above Mary is “Mormon” Jesus. Blue-eyed-blond-hair-red-cloaked-never-making-eye-contact-back-lit-head-and-shoulders-Jesus. Mormon Jesus is wearing a T-shirt under his red cloak which reads, “I want your life.” Obviously this is not mainstream Protestant Jesus. He would have dark hair, dark eyes, he would always make eye contact and his T-shirt would read, “I (heart) you.” in fuzzy red lettering. Or maybe that’s just my idea.

Above Mormon Jesus is an AOL CD with the Pyrotechnic Porno Babies penned upon it with indelible marker.(Not the words, the cartoon characters.) It hangs to the left of the light switch plate. Above the CD is a frame containing pair of silver, miniature Arabic sandals. Above the sandals is a small plaque, about four inches in diameter containing a sample of Lefcara lace, handmade in Cyprus. Above the plaque, dangling from the ceiling is a purple, paper Chinese lamp, with no light source.

On the door there is a purple post-it note with the word “LUNCH” and a smiley face printed on it. It was to remind me to take my lunch in my previous days of employment. Above the door in the corner to the right is a web of red yarn. Entangled in the web is giant golden “S.”

A coat rack, a Pakistani puzzle (unsolved) and Senorita Misteriosa hang quietly on the opposing wall. Senorita Misteriosa features a “glow atomic dress.” And willingly tells her story to all who take the time to learn it. She is an accoutrement for mystery. Tucked just behind Senorita Misteriosa is a blue, glittery sticker in the shape of a butterfly that announces “Self Esteem.”

One corner of my living room.