I’ve been working on will power and self control. One issue at a time for me. There are plenty to last me a life time. The one I’m working on now is selfishness. I think I am by nature selfish. I think most people are actually. Some people aren’t, they give away everything, share everything, but most, like me, I think, have a harder time. We have to work on it. Some of us have to work on it more than others. It’s big things and little things that tempt us to selfishness. When we break a candy in half, we want the bigger piece. When it’s time to share the cost of an event, we think we should have to pay less. When it comes to gifts; we try to get away cheap.

For me I suppose it comes from growing up poor. There wasn’t much to share, and I wasn’t usually asked to share, as everyone knew there was so little to go around. Other people often volunteered to pay for things for me because they knew I didn’t have anything.

You would think that with all the generosity I was shown I would have learned to show it myself. Some bad habits die hard though. Now I’m making the efforts in small things and large. When I break a piece of candy I make a note to give away the bigger piece. When it come to paying my part I try to give a little extra, I try to remember to offer more than I think is “fair.” When I feel put upon, I try to ask for another opinion. I don’t always succeed, but at least I’m trying to change a bad habit. I think that’s what I need to do to grow and learn and become better. I want to be better, no matter the cost. I know the reward will be greater.